Why Seeking Therapy Is a Sign of Strength, Not Weakness

Published October 9, 2024 by Zencare Team and Written by Noah Eastman, LMFT.

Therapy is often misunderstood, but seeking it is an intelligent and courageous step toward mental well-being. Asking for help when you are struggling is not a sign of weakness. At different points in our lives, we are all forced to confront difficult changes. Family members get sick, we lose our jobs, relationships fall apart. When we choose to accept the painful things that happen to us, there is also a chance for personal growth. The famous psychologist and holocaust survivor, Viktor Frankl, wrote,

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

Choosing to go to therapy involves opening up to the painful feelings in your body, which also hold seeds of growth and maturation. Developing emotional intelligence means learning to work with your emotions instead of overriding them, or letting them override you. A common misconception is that going to therapy means you are somehow ‘not fit enough’ to function in society on your own. However, it is an act of strength to realize you need support.

Therapy complements, rather than replaces, the support provided by friends and family.

Going to therapy means you are choosing to slow down and develop skills to deal with the overwhelm of living in our fast-paced, individualistic society. It is an act of kindness to give yourself a nonjudgemental space to heal from the past, gain insight about yourself, and chart a new path forward.

Therapy has historically faced stigma, especially for men, who are often taught to suppress emotions. When young men have their feelings hurt by a mean joke, the common response is “don’t be so sensitive.” When these boys grow up and face difficult times, they remember that injunction, and hide their authentic feelings from others and pretend they are fine. The advice one young man received from his father when he was depressed was, “Just put all your effort into work, and you’ll get over it.” When you tell someone to dismiss their own feelings, you limit their self-exploration, which could lead to a deeper relationship to themselves and the world.

Cultural perceptions of masculinity often equate seeking help with weakness, but this is changing. Celebrities and athletes, like 5-time gold medalist Michael Phelps, are starting to open up on social media about their mental health struggles. Phelps has become a huge spokesperson for therapy, and has said that therapy helped him accept and cope with his depression.

The social stigma around therapy will not go away overnight. There are many cultures that still believe that talking openly about your emotional struggles is taboo, and not helpful, and that it is better to treat anxiety and depression by praying, or taking herbs. While these interventions have their place, the fear of judgment by one’s family or community makes it really hard to accept help from a mental health professional. One of the key parts of therapy is simply validating one’s experience. The more you can accept your own feelings, thoughts, and behaviors, the closer you can get to having a healthier relationship with yourself and others.

Common Misconceptions About Therapy

Many believe therapy is only for those with severe mental health issues, but it benefits anyone facing life's challenges. Mental health challenges often arise because we don’t have a safe space to express ourselves. Other times, it is an outside stressor from our environment that creates disturbing symptoms. Psychiatric medication can be used in conjunction with therapy as a tool to help you navigate challenging experiences, and fulfill the overwhelming drudgery of day-to-day responsibilities.

Some people think they should handle their problems alone, but therapy provides valuable outside help and perspective. Getting mental health support does not mean you are ‘broken,’ or ‘a failure,’ it means that you are humble enough to accept that you need help finding a better way forward. We are not meant to carry our problems alone. Financial difficulties, housing insecurity, divorce, grief, climate-related anxiety, eating disorders — these are problems thrust upon us by forces outside of our control. Seeking the professional help of a therapist is a wise decision because it better equips you to face the internal and external challenges that life throws your way.

Concerns about therapy being too expensive can be mitigated with options like insurance and online therapy services. Mental health directories like Zencare, help you navigate the confusing world of mental health coverage. Zencare has many resources to help you navigate insurance and how to pay for therapy, including a comprehensive guide. The price of therapy is based on a variety of factors: whether you see a therapist in-network or out-of-network, if you have a PPO or an HMO, the cost of your copay, or whether or not you have reached your deductible. Zencare’s insurance resource pages can help you know where to look in order to find this information on your summary of benefits page. It is always advised to contact your insurance provider directly if you have any questions. The cost of therapy is affordable when you can connect to the right options.

In order to qualify for reimbursements from your insurance company, you need to have a superbill. Upon request, most therapists will provide a superbill, which is an itemized receipt that you can submit to your insurance companies in order to receive partial or full reimbursement.

If you cannot afford therapy that is over $150, there are many community mental health clinics that offer therapy on a sliding scale, meaning the fee is set according to your financial situation. You will most likely see a graduate student or an associate who is accruing hours in order to become licensed as a therapist. Less experience does not necessarily mean you won’t receive impactful and meaningful therapy. If you are looking for a therapist that shares a similar background, there are therapist directories, like Zencare, that are geared towards helping BIPOC, or LGBTQ+ folks connect with a therapist in their affinity group. Zencare has an identity filter that helps therapy seekers find therapists with similar identities, cultures, and backgrounds.

Why Seeking Therapy is an Act of Strength

Therapy allows individuals to confront difficult mental health struggles and past traumas head-on, which requires strength. When depression, anxiety, or apathy is resisted, it does not go away, but instead, hijacks our will power. The hardest step for most people is admitting that they are having trouble finding healthy ways to cope with life’s stressors. It is often the case that only when past, unaddressed traumas rear their head in a dramatic way, or a crisis happens, that one finally seeks help.

Difficult times are unavoidable, but they can be traversed with a lot less suffering by seeking support from a mental health professional. Seeking therapy and prioritizing taking care of your mental health requires a lot of courage and strength because you are putting a great deal of trust in someone to help you. However, acknowledging psychological needs and seeking help demonstrates emotional intelligence and a desire for growth. Being vulnerable in therapy can be difficult, but it is essential for true healing and progress. Therapy helps individuals develop new coping mechanisms and actively work toward creating a better life.

The Benefits of Therapy and Overcoming Stigma

Therapy promotes personal growth and improves mental well-being, helping individuals become the best version of themselves. It is not uncommon for clients to feel worse when starting therapy. This is because the symptoms that bring you into therapy often lead you to unearthing other difficult moments that you have previously managed on your own. Personal growth entails accepting the deeper layers of emotional pain that could be holding you back.

Finding the right therapist who is a good fit is key to addressing your unique needs and making progress in therapy. Take your time as you meet with different therapists. Each therapist has different skills that will complement your unique needs. Ask questions and don’t hesitate to schedule consultations with a few practitioners until you find the right fit.

Therapy provides a confidential and safe space where personal issues can be explored without fear of judgment. In recent years, therapy has become more widely accepted, with changing societal views helping to reduce stigma. Due to the long history of systematic oppression of folks with marginalized identities in this country, the field is still predominantly dominated by white, cis-gender therapists. However, there are starting to be more therapists from a wider variety of backgrounds that can support you on your journey. The American Psychological Association shares that more people of color are earning psychology degrees, which is enhancing the diversity of the psychology workforce.

Therapy as the First Step Toward Healing

Taking the first step to begin therapy can be daunting, but it is the most important step toward healing. Sometimes it can feel overwhelming looking at the sheer amount of therapists out there on the Internet. However, once you do a little research and talk to friends about the different modalities, you will start to get a better sense of what type of therapy you are looking for.

Therapy is a long-term process that requires patience and dedication, but the personal growth it fosters is invaluable. Don’t expect to instantly feel better when you begin therapy. You will often feel worse, before you feel like you are making progress. However, with patience and self-compassion, you will gain more insight about yourself, and learn new ways to deal with the difficulties that arise in your life.

Conclusion

Therapy should be viewed as a sign of strength, demonstrating courage and a commitment to mental well-being. The first step is the hardest, admitting something isn’t working and needs to change. If your family isn’t familiar with the benefits of talk therapy, then talk to a trusted friend who may share some reflections about what they have gained by working with a therapist. If you are dismayed by the high price tag of therapy, don’t worry, there are affordable ways to receive the care and guidance you are looking for. The benefits of therapy extend beyond mental health, helping individuals lead happier, more fulfilling lives. Seeking therapy is an empowering choice that allows individuals to face challenges and heal in a supportive environment.