Do’s and Don’ts for Parents of Young Athletes

Published on March 17, 2025 by Zencare Team. Written by Zencare Team and Renee Eddy, LCSW, CASAC.

Watching your child play sports is exciting. You see them develop important skills, stay active, and build friendships. But as a parent, it can be tricky to find the right balance between encouragement and pressure.

On one hand, you want to cheer them on and help them succeed. On the other, too much pressure — whether it’s pushing for wins or expecting perfection — can lead to stress, burnout, or even a loss of love for the game. Parental support plays a crucial role in youth sports, influencing a child’s experience, confidence, and long-term love for physical activity. While encouragement can help young athletes develop important skills and healthy habits, too much pressure can have the opposite effect, leading to stress, burnout, and even a loss of passion for the sport.

So, how do you support your youth athlete in a way that builds confidence and keeps sports fun? Striking a balance is key. Parents should focus on fostering the joy of sports, prioritizing effort over results, and ensuring their child’s well-being — both physically and emotionally. In this guide, we’ll explore the best things parents can do to create a positive experience, as well as common mistakes to avoid. Plus, we’ll hear insights from a therapist who works with young athletes navigating these challenges.

The Do’s: How to Positively Support Your Young Athlete

1. Keep the focus on fun

Sports should be a fun way for young children to develop foundational skills and a life of physical activity. When parents focus solely on winning or pushing their child toward elite levels, it can take away the enjoyment that fuels long-term participation. At the heart of it all, sports should be a fun way for kids to move, grow, and develop confidence. The moment the game starts feeling like a job, something’s off.

Renee Eddy, LCSW, CASAC has worked with young athletes and shares:

"One of the most important things parents can do for their young athletes is to foster a positive and supportive environment. Sports should be enjoyable, even when a child has serious ambitions. A key mistake parents sometimes make is projecting their own dreams onto their children rather than allowing them to pursue their own goals."

So, celebrate their excitement! Let them experiment with different sports to see what they truly love. Support their passion, not just their performance.

2. Praise effort, not just results

Winning feels great, but the important skills your child gains from sports go far beyond a scoreboard. Learning to persevere, improve, and bounce back from challenges are life lessons that will serve them well into adulthood.

Instead of just saying, “Great game!” after a win, try:

By shifting the focus to effort and growth, you’re helping your child build resilience — both on and off the field.

3. Set the example for good sportsmanship

Kids pick up on everything, including how you react to coaches, referees, and other players. If they see you yelling at an official or criticizing a teammate, they’ll think that’s normal.

Instead, be the role model. Avoid criticizing coaches or referees from the sidelines, as this can send the message that external factors are to blame for every loss. Instead, reinforce that challenges are a part of sports and an opportunity to grow. Cheer for good plays — on both sides. Encourage fair play and teamwork. Show them that respect matters just as much as talent.

4. Keep sports in balance with life

Even for high school athletes, sports should never take over everything. Kids need time for school activities, family, and rest to stay healthy and happy.

A common mistake parents make is allowing sports to overshadow everything else in their child’s life. While dedication is important, high school athletes and younger players need a balance between sports, academics, family time, and rest. But sometimes, young athletes take on too much — especially if they feel pressure to perform at elite levels. One therapist shared this experience:

Renee Eddy shares a story of a young female athlete who was excelling but struggling with overwhelming expectations:

"She had taken on too much, juggling intense training, academic pressures, and extracurricular activities, all while trying to meet the expectations of those around her. She felt the need to prove herself, not just to her coaches and teammates, but also to her family. Though she said she could handle it, the stress was taking a toll on her mental and emotional health. She was constantly exhausted and anxious, afraid of letting anyone down."

Parents should look for signs of burnout, exhaustion, and anxiety, even when their child claims they can handle everything. Parents, it’s okay to step in. If your child is exhausted or anxious, help them prioritize and take breaks when needed. Balance is key to long-term success.

5. Keep the conversation open

A supportive parent-child relationship involves open communication. You don’t have to have all the answers — you just need to listen. Ask your child how they feel about their sport. What do they love? What’s frustrating? How can you support them better?

Renee Eddy emphasizes:

"I love working with teen athletes because they are passionate and driven. But more than anything, they want to be heard. As a parent, your role is to uplift and guide them, not just in sports but in life. When you provide a balance of encouragement, understanding, and care, you help them grow into resilient, well-rounded individuals both on and off the field"

Support their decisions and allow them to express concerns without fear of disappointment. Your role is to guide, not dictate, their athletic journey.

The Don’ts: Common Mistakes Parents Make

1. Don’t try to live through your child

It’s natural to feel proud of your child’s achievements. But there’s a difference between supporting their dreams and making them chase yours. Pushing them to fulfill unachieved dreams can lead to frustration and resentment. Let them set their own goals and define what success means for them.

Renee Eddy shares a powerful example:

"I once worked with a teenage client whose dream was to become a professional baseball player. He was passionate and deeply committed, attending a specialized high school known for developing young athletes. However, his father’s expectations became a source of stress rather than support. Although the young man worked hard, balancing academics, rigorous training, and healthy lifestyle habits, his father would make him feel guilty for wanting to enjoy normal teenage experiences like spending time with friends or going to a concert.

His father’s pressure made him feel like he could never make a mistake, and that kind of expectation can be overwhelming for any teen. No child should feel like their worth is tied to perfection. Mistakes are part of learning and growth, both in sports and in life. Instead of criticism or anger, parents should approach challenges with encouragement and a calm, understanding tone. Your support, both in words and actions, will make a world of difference in your child’s confidence and well-being."

Your child’s journey should be theirs. Let them set their own goals and define what success looks like for them.

2. Don’t over-coach from the sidelines

Unless you’re the actual coach, your job is to be their biggest fan — not their instructor. Critiquing their performance, especially right after a game, can kill their confidence and take the joy out of playing.

Instead of nitpicking, try:

Trust me — your child will appreciate your support way more than an in-depth game analysis.

3. Don’t push early specialization

Many parents think specializing in one sport from an early age is the best way to raise a professional athlete. But research actually suggests that playing different sports improves motor development, injury prevention, and cognitive development.

Early specialization can lead to burnout and serious injuries, so let your child explore. They’ll build a stronger athletic foundation and stay excited about staying active.

4. Don’t blame coaches, refs, or teammates

Bad calls happen. Tough losses sting. But if you’re constantly blaming others for the outcome of a game, your child will learn to make excuses instead of taking responsibility.

Help them shift their mindset:

A growth mindset will take them much further than blaming someone else ever could.

5. Don’t make winning the only goal

Success isn’t just about trophies — it’s about personal growth. Youth sports should teach teamwork, discipline, and resilience — not just how to win.

If your child feels like winning is the only thing that matters, they might stop playing altogether. Help them see that the joy of sports is in the journey, not just the outcome.

The Role of Therapy in Supporting Young Athletes

Sports can be an incredible source of confidence and joy, but they can also bring stress, pressure, and high expectations — both from others and from within. While physical health is often a priority for athletes, mental well-being is just as important. That’s where therapy can play a crucial role.

Young athletes face unique challenges, from balancing academics and training to handling competition and personal expectations. Even when they seem to be managing everything well, it doesn’t always mean they should have to carry that weight alone.

Renee Eddy explains:

"It is important for parents to recognize when their child is taking on too much, even if they insist they are fine. Just because they can handle something does not mean they should have to. As a parent, it is crucial to check in with your teen, help them prioritize responsibilities, and ensure they are not overloading themselves.

Just as you take your child to the doctor for physical checkups, it is equally valuable to check in on their mental well-being. Sometimes, simply talking to a therapist can give them a safe space to express themselves without fear of judgment. Seeking support does not mean something is wrong, it just means they need someone to listen."

Therapy provides young athletes with a space to talk about their fears, frustrations, and personal challenges — without the pressure of performing or meeting expectations. Whether they’re struggling with burnout, anxiety, self-doubt, or stress, having a trained professional to guide them can make a significant difference in their overall well-being.

As parents, normalizing mental health care just like physical fitness, injury prevention, and skill development teaches kids that caring for their mind is just as important as caring for their body. Encouraging therapy isn’t a sign of weakness — it’s a way to help young athletes develop emotional resilience, healthy coping mechanisms, and a lifelong understanding of self-care.

Conclusion: Being a Positive Influence in Your Child’s Athletic Journey

Your support can shape your child’s entire experience with sports. The goal isn’t just to raise a great athlete — it’s to raise a happy, confident, and well-rounded person.

So remember:

As the therapist shared, just like you take your child for physical checkups, it’s just as important to check in on their mental well-being. Talking to a therapist doesn’t mean something is wrong, it simply gives them a safe space to express themselves and navigate the challenges of being a young athlete. By normalizing mental health support, you’re teaching them that emotional resilience is just as crucial as skill development and injury prevention.

By focusing on healthy habits, balance, and a lifelong love for physical activity, you’ll help your child thrive — not just in sports, but in life.